DARK DAYS ARE FOR HIS GLORY!
(by E. H. Maze)
Chapter 4
Three Conditions for Further Miracles - Like One
Another, Like John the Baptist and like Christ
Like One Another
Ever wonder how many lessons
you will have to learn before things start going your way? The lessons of life are endless - more like
paths than lessons. And, I have come
across a path that leads to a place where all the questions to the lessons of
life have been answered; a place where all the problems are settled; a place
where tragedy, loss, depression and insecurity meet their end. It’s a hard place to get to. I have been getting there for many years
now. I am glad that I went to that
place. Wish I could have stayed. But, it’s as hard to stay there as it is to
arrive. Nevertheless, come with me to
this place for a while. Perhaps, we
could both stay around for just a little bit.
Yes! You may have already guessed that the place
we all need to arrive at is at the foot of the Cross. But, it is not just “at” the Cross. There is power in the blood, but the journey
is not complete - and this is the secret - the journey is not complete until
you stretch out your arms and dive on in - under the blood.
It is a mystery, indeed: Without the
shedding of blood, their is no remission of sin! The sacrifice of Jesus,
which included the necessity that His blood be poured out for us, brought us out
of darkness and into His marvelous light. I gave up theologizing the
reason behind God's thoughts concerning this "required ritual" and
have, instead, decided to live by faith. It's easier that way and I don't
need to know everything anymore.
I didn’t need to learn a great
deal about salvation when I went to the Cross.
I just went there and discovered the truth there. I
always limited the “power of the Cross” to points relevant to salvation. But, becoming a Christian is not just about
salvation; it is about processing this great gift called salvation in and
through your life. The Bible calls it
“working out” with “fear and trembling.”
My story is about the practical reality of a person being made more
whole than what was experienced at his first stop at the foot of the
Cross. I had to go back to that Cross to
learn how to go on from the cross.
TWO OF US GOING NOWHERE
(Exodus 33:22-23)
There is an old song, “Two of
Us” by the Beatles. It starts out, “Two
of us going nowhere.” It is probably
only about two people just kicking back, waiting for time to pass. Sometimes, Christians do that. Wait.
Suffer. Hoping it all calms down. Sure that it will all go away. But, in a struggling marriage, the phrase
“Two of us going nowhere” was becoming a tragic epitaph to our future.
In May of 1997 my family faced
the same miserable fate that so many families have been confronted with - a
separation that was nearing divorce. Due
to circumstances that forced my wife and I to face our problems, we finally
admitted that we needed counseling and began the process of recovery. She has been a Christian since a very small
child. I, after nearly twenty years in
the drug scene, had become a devoted minister, dedicated to full-time ministry. It wasn’t long after our marriage, that we
began to drift violently toward the rocks - like the waves that appear so
inspiring from the shore, but when you are caught up in those waves they can
crash heavily against the shoreline - the undertow alone can drown you.
In that time, the Lord spoke
to me in ways that I still find difficult to verbalize or to write in such a way
that I feel confident in being understood.
An angry spirit had controlled my ability to deal with pressure. [The
angry spirit I now understand to have been a Spirit of Anger - there is no
difference, by the way, between an “angry spirit” and a “spirit of anger,”
except for the admitting of it.]
Sometimes, the simplest decisions would throw me into a rage. Because my wife had come to fear me, I had
been, rightfully, accused of abuse. In
spite of the fact that I had not physically harmed my wife over the years, I
finally realized that my actions had obviously driven her to make the decision
to find an escape. Her own medical
history had been plagued and I had not done everything
that I could have done to help her or understand her condition. Of course, the anger raging in me sought to
blame her and I felt quite justified.
She began to turn away from me and find support from other people. I just didn’t know how to “fix” her – not
realizing, at the times, I was as broken as she, if not more broken.
Desperately seeking friendship
and help, she had become involved with a “friend” who supported her. Eventually, her friend felt that she should
tell someone else - a counselor or fellow pastor – about her problems with
me. This friend had suspected that my
wife’s life was in danger, as she told her of the fears she had when she was at
home or alone with me. The friend’s
inability to deal with these kinds of spiritual problems, lead her to communicate
with people who eventually confronted me.
My wife immediately went into depression and fear and turned to a
counselor who (with great wisdom) advised her that we should separate for a
time until we could both seek further godly counsel. Which, we did.
Although I did begin seeing a
counselor, what happened to me from that experience can only be accredited to
the power of God. The details are too
complicated, but let it just be said that I had an angry spirit that was
causing me to see things very selfishly.
Whether that angry spirit was from my childhood (my father committed
suicide when I was six) or from my disappointment in my wife’s illness or some
other unknown source I cannot say - and, it’s not important in the grander
scheme of things.
The important thing is that,
during the time we were separated, I realized how controlling I had been with
everyone and everything. In essence, I
realized that I was mad; I was angry; therefore, out of control. I, also, realized that the reason my anger
never manifested itself in physical violence (well, I ran my fists through a
couple of walls) was my attempt to prevent being found out - I had coped with
my own illness for years and had learned to protect it.
WE FOCUS
TOO MUCH ON OUR CONDITION IN SIN AND NOT ENOUGH ON OUR POSITION IN CHRIST.
Here is Miracle #3
Through those Dark Days of
Separation, the Lord taught me the difference between the kind of self-control
that is lead by the Spirit and the self-control that is flesh-powered. This well-known poem by Helen McDowell
illustrates my attempt to have God prove everybody else wrong and me right,
only to find that I was the failure and the reason behind my own troubles.
Once I prayed (I know not what
I said), “Show me myself, O Lord!”
Alas, I did not dread the
hideous sight which now I shudder to behold;
Because, I knew not self
aright.
And I was lead in answer to my
prayer; as step by step to see my wretched heart laid bare.
Then I prayed, “Stay, Lord, I
cannot bear the sight.”
And pityingly His hand was
stayed.
Now, I pray (I know my prayer
is right), “Show me Thyself, O Lord.
Be to my soul the Bright and
Morning Star to shine upon the grave of self.
And lead my heart from earth
afar.”
By
Helen McDowell
I received a tremendous
healing from the Lord during this time.
However, having been a Pastor for ten years and having seen the
temporary nature of these kinds of experiences, I needed to give myself time to
allow the Lord to continue to work this out of me. My wife and I separated for about two months
and then began the process of restoring our relationship. We dated and talked on the phone and bought
each other little tokens of our willingness to work it out. After four months, we were back together and
we have been experiencing great joy in our relationship, believing that God has
restored what had seemed to be forever lost.
The grace of God in our lives
and his power to sustain us and save our marriage has been amazing. We still feel
that we have a long way to go and are continuing to talk openly and honestly
with each other. Everyday I give thanks
to God for the victory He has given me over that angry man – my angry self.
My wife and I have learned how
to discuss issues without fear or rejection or without arguing (which we both
pursued passionately before in our efforts to “position” ourselves). I hope that it does not sound trite to say
that “all things are as they should be.”
I, too, have been touched by
the shadow of God’s glory, can return to following after Him and pursuing my
calling with confidence, and renewed vision.
That time of difficulty in our marriage turned out to be the best thing
for the both us. We were going nowhere
together. Now, we are thankful for not
just the “fiery ordeal” that has scorched our witness, but, more importantly,
for the “flames” of His Consuming Fire that purposefully destroyed us to give
us new life.
Like John the Baptist
God invented Dark Days to
declare His Glory! "Yeah, though I walk
through the valley of death..." Do you remember that great
verse? The
While God was preparing John
the Baptist to come on the scene, God was also preparing the earth for the
appearance of His own Son. The
prophecies of John the Baptist were that he was coming as one who would prepare
the way for the Messiah. John’s call and
destiny were clear. He had little
choice, but to obey. In fact, that was
all he had to do. If he would merely
obey the call of God on his life, then it was all well planned out. John followed that call – that purpose. How weird was that? How simple.
Have you had something to say
to God about where you are right now in your life? Have you been frustrated with His will and
purpose? God directed John the Baptist’s
father to name his son when he was born.
But, because of his lack of faith, he refused to believe and obey the
Lord. The Lord made him unable to talk
until the child was born and his father named him “John.” Finally, after the baby’s birth John’s father
realized that God was sovereign - that means that God’s will “will” be
done. So, John’s father obeyed God and,
in his deaf-mute state wrote John’s name in the sand.
What Does That Mean to You and
Me?
Just like John’s Father was
unable to speak until he obeyed the Lord, we won’t be able to say a word,
either for or against God, until we settle in our hearts as to who we are in
Christ. We may open our mouths and words
may come out but they won’t mean anything to anyone until we are speaking God’s
will.
You have heard of John the Baptist, I assume. He was the guy who went around
preaching about the Messiah coming to
You and I have an occupation,
a calling, a life's pursuit. Thankfully, you and I will probably have a
more pleasant end than the end that John experienced. We have already had a better start to our
lives and are probably enjoying a better middle. If we merely obey the call of God on our
lives, then it is all well planned out.
Some of us worry about the end too much.
And, some of us worry about the "now" too much. But, the ones who suffer the most are those
who worry about the past too much. They
live as if they have already been beheaded.
They are afraid of the future because of the past. Of course, they need to understand that the
future was never meant to partner with the past.
John had no past – that is, no
ugly past that is recorded about him. He
seemed dedicated and faithful from childhood.
That’s the difference between him and “us.” Your past is (as is mine), most likely,
plagued with some sin(s) – and, we assume that disqualifies us from being
chosen or exempts us from volunteering to be chosen. That is so wrong!
The future is a new road that
is in front of you, no matter which road you took in the past. My Point (there always is one, you
know): Don't run around like a chicken
with its head cut off.
The past has no future unless you give it one.
We are no different from John
the Baptist. Even though we have come
after the Messiah instead of before him, we still have the same call – every
one of us. Not the exact same call, not
the same ministry, not the same end (he was beheaded remember). Like I just said, you and I will probably
have a more pleasant end. The point is
that, in order to fulfill the plan of God, John was filled with the Holy
Spirit. He had the spirit of Christ in
himself just like you and I do. He had
to grow up as a young man just like you and I have to. He needed to be filled with the Holy Spirit
in order to maintain the strength to tackle the world - just as you and I need
today.
You are, also, a forerunner of
Christ. You were brought into this world
for a purpose. Don’t ever suppose that
your life would not be complete if you are not remembered as a great president,
or a multi-millionaire or a Nobel Peace Prize winner. None of those things come close to the
purpose of your creation. It would be
better for you to be a simple, half-broke (or nearly well to do) pauper who
fulfills his true destiny than to be all that the world let’s you imagine you
could be - and to be that without a fulfilled heart and soul.
In the prophecy concerning
John the Baptist, it is clearly and specifically spelled out what he would
become; how he would live and die. Zach
and Liz knew it. John himself knew it.
You and I are different. You, most likely, had no one standing over
your mother’s swollen belly prophesying “great things” about you. Your father was most likely not a
priest. Nor, was he struck dumb or blind
when he argued with your mother about the name they would choose for you. You never grew up under a religious structure
that insisted upon the complete dedication of your life to God’s divine
will. Most likely, you grew up pretty
normal - I know, you don’t think it was normal, but that is how we all feel -
which, of course, makes us all normal.
Which is not, by the way, how John grew up. You can tell from just the 3-4 minutes it
takes to read John’s story that he was different - and, he knew it.
Yet, you and I are exactly
like John the Baptist in one aspect. It
is the one principal that rules the world; the one wheel that spins us along
the way. The way that we are exactly
like John the Baptist is that God had planned us. He designed us. He chose us.
He ordered our lives. Many people
do not believe that. They think that we
exist only because we were conceived by our parents. After that (and we will talk more about this
later), we may or may not find a way to survive. God is, maybe, out there and He may have
created us, but His plans don’t include us - at least not any big plans.
Let’s forget the big plans
idea. There are no big plans left. The big plan was Jesus’ death, burial and
resurrection.
Did you know that God planned
most everything concerning your past?
This is not to say that God planned or allowed the bad things for the
purpose of hurting you. He is much kinder
than that. He is much wiser than that. He sees the future remember. Let me put together a little “prophecy” for
you in order to make my point. This
prophecy will be a mixture of things from different people I know – but, you
should find yourself in here somewhere.
“The Lord will make you to be
born of parents who will not do the best job raising you. Your father will commit suicide when you are
only six years old. You will suffer
migraine headaches for over twenty years.
Your husband will cheat on you and you will find yourself having to decide
whether to work it out or give it up.
Your firstborn son will choose an alternate lifestyle and your only
daughter will become pregnant by a rock musician who will abandon her. You will not speak to each other for twelve
years. Your dog will be hit by a
car. Your nose will never be straight,
no matter how many plastic surgeons attempt to fix it. Your best friend will abandon you by choosing
to believe a lie. You won’t be able to
fix it. You won't be able to get a handle on anything. Eventually,
you will simply give in to the doldrums of life - until you die.”
Sounds bad, huh? Your life, like mine, would make a great
Country Song, huh? Well, if you ask me,
it is no worse than eating locust, living in the desert and being beheaded like
the John the Baptist. John never blamed
God. Neither should you.
But, this prophecy continues and has an
interesting twist designed into it that you didn't expect..
“You will learn better
parenting and the generation after you will succeed because of your
strength. I will put a Mother’s heart in
you. After years of self-pity stemming
from your father’s abandonment I will become your Father and show you the love
you missed. I will be your healer - when
you turn to me, I will touch that part of you that has been so painful. Not only, will I heal the pain, I will also
heal the brain. You will say, ‘Oh, God,
why did I not trust you from the beginning?’
I will answer, ‘You trust me now - that is sufficient. That was my plan. I planned this; I knew you before you knew
Me; I knew the paths you would choose and the paths that were chosen for you;
and, I was with you. I know the plans I
have made for you; plans to bless and not curse.’
“In my word,
“I will heal the pain and I
will heal the brain.”
John the Baptist was beheaded
because of the ministry that God created for Him. He lost his head for a
divine call. Believe me, John gladly gave His life because he knew he had
fulfilled the destiny God had planned.
I want to assure you that, no
matter what your end, your life will only be fulfilled when you have finally surrender to
His will.
Like Christ
Your beginnings were just like everyone else’s. Your parents conceived you; you spent several months in your mother’s womb, and then came into the world helpless and needy.
How you came into the world, you already know. What you don’t know (or can’t remember) is why you came into the world. I’m not going to tell you that you are unique – you’re not. You were born into this world for the same reason we all were: To LIVE!
What I am about to say is really going to shock you, because no one likes to talk about it. It’s one of those little secrets about how you feel about yourself that, either you are afraid to talk about or you have tried to talk about before, but nobody really cared to listen.
Here is what you have been thinking: You have been thinking, perhaps all your life, that you were born only because your parents had sex.
But, that is
so far from the truth - that’s not it at all. Your parent’s responsibility for your being
born had little to do with your reason for living.
Here is how you came to
be: God.
Now, wait a minute! Let’s not trivialize this. Don’t cop an attitude on me quite yet. Let me show you exactly what was going on
during that time.
In the right time (God’s
timing is always right, so your birth was right from the beginning) He decided
that you were “to be.” He decided to
create you. The timing, by the way, was
perfect. There was a plan that God was
putting into motion. The plan was you.
My own miserable (past) opinion of myself is
no different than yours.
What I am about to say is an
old song. You have said to yourself
(and, you say it to everyone you meet - if not in words, then in your actions
which you don’t realize speaks volumes about you and how you feel about
yourself) that you were a mistake. Your
best opinion of yourself has been that God never intended for you “to be.” Your parents had sex and there you were. And now you have a thousand reasons, excuses
and answers to your fallen character and environment. It is comfortable for you because you can
justify yourself by not having to blame yourself. Everyone around you is to blame. Trouble is, you make it uncomfortable for
everyone around you – they feel your anger and pain because you project it onto
them so easily, casually (like a casualty-of-war, actually). Mistakes may have justification for that – if
you were really a mistake. But, you are
not a mistake. This is an old song: I am Just a Mistake; nobody loves me! Everybody hates me! I’m gonna go eat worms!
If you don’t like that angle,
try this. Let’s suppose that you don’t
think you were a mistake. Your parents
planned you. But, they are lousy
parents. Now what? Well, now we can blame God for putting us in
the wrong place. Yeah, maybe my parents planned me, but not God. Do you get the story? Everyone has the same excuse: We eventually get to blame someone else for
our situation in life.
Finally, there are those who
like to believe that God had everything to do with it. It’s His fault. He, uncaringly and with some kind of sadistic
and cosmic force, placed this little thing called “you” on this planet to play
with – like a child who eventually pulls the wings off the fly when he is done
with it. That is your image of God and
at some point in your life you bought into that image. It’s okay to admit it. You may not believe that now (and I hope you
don’t). Maybe you never think of it that
way, but I suspect the thought floated around in your brain at one time. Admitting it is the only way that I can get
to you. When you accept that the lie
that you have been living is your own creation, only then can you begin to open
your eyes to other possibilities.
A person who doesn’t believe in a hateful devil is
the hardest person to convince that there is a loving God.
There is a miracle right
there! The miracle is that God can
change your way of thinking. But, the
miracle set before you will sit before until you stop pretending that it’s not
there. Start believing that there are
forces at work to destroy you, then, you can begin to believe that there is a
“Force” within you to build you up.
“What,” you exclaim to
me. “Did you just tell me that my
thoughts about myself and God are from the devil?” Yes, I did.
From the time you were a little baby you have been spoiled by this
world. You have not been trained in the
ways of God, but instead you have been kicking and crawling your way, trying to
walk. But, walking the way of this world
is futile.
Now that you are listening,
let me introduce you to another baby who was born so many years ago that, even
though the story is still told, history has dissolved His birth into an annual
memory that whispers of joy to the world, but has become silenced by the person
whose ears have been plugged and seems to hear only a faint whisper. Oh! The power of that whisper – it is more
powerful than the clamber and hustling, bustling bells of Christmas. Are you listening?
The
There was a virgin girl, a
stable, a star, shepherds, animals, an Innkeeper, and an expectant father
waiting for a child to be born. Not only
was the child not the expectant father’s, but presumably the child was the Son
of God. It was to be a miraculous
birth. God put everything in place to
reveal to the world His plan. Jesus
didn’t come into the world so that God could prove His ability to do it. He had a plan.
His plan for His Son, no
matter how extremely urgent and essential, was not that much different from His
plan for your life. In fact, His plan
for Jesus was for Him to be an example for you and me.
The beginnings of a battle
plan are not always told to the soldiers.
They are simply told to obey orders.
They are told where to go, what to eat, whom to kill. The Bible clearly shows that Jesus had to
“grow” in knowledge. Even though He was
born for a purpose, He still had to go through the wonderful “weaning”
stage. He had to suck for His mother’s milk;
he had to learn how to not poop uncontrollably; learn how to sit up; learn to
talk. I had to do the very same
things. So did you. That alone qualifies us to be emotionally
attached to God. He made His only Son go
through so much. I would never want to
minimize the fact that Jesus came to suffer much greater trials than being a
baby - but, I also can’t deny that He did have to suffer the growing stages to
get to the mature man who would one day give His life for you and me.
So, think about that. What had God put around you when you were
born? Why didn’t God have Jesus born in a
palace instead of a manger? Why didn’t
God have you born differently? He put
shepherds around His Son. He put nurses
around you. The announcement was the
same: “Here is my son (or daughter), in
whom I am well-pleased.”
Why was God well pleased with
your birth? What makes you so special
that He would surround you with so much care and love? Was it His concern that you would one day
(like all humankind) turn away from Him?
No! He was well pleased with you
then because He had made you for His purpose.
He saw down the road. He was
confident that you would live for His glory.
He was confident that He would be able to use you for His glory. He was assured (in Himself) that you would
lead others to His glory.
He made me, let me live all
these years just so that He could do this miracle in me, so that I could share
this miracle with you - when you were ready.
Are you ready?
Now, you may not have been
planned as the Savior of the world (no matter what you might think). Neither am I.
And, you may not have even been planned by your parents. And God did not have to write your story in a
book. And, hopefully, you did not have
to flee to
Listen! When your mother gave birth to you it was not
just her and others who rejoiced. God
looked down and smiled and pronounced to the world, “Here is John! (Or, Mary – or, Alexis – or, Ahkbalon).”
Your miraculous birth was just
the beginning. From that day on he has
been watching over you. Not just because
he cares. He doesn’t just want to
protect you by keeping you safe. He has
a greater plan for you. Do you want to
know what that plan is? Of course, you do.
Wouldn’t it be great to know what God’s great purpose for you is? Wouldn’t it be great to know that God’s great plan is being worked out in you (through you)? Wouldn’t it be great if I would just simply tell you about the miracle so you could receive it and get on with your life? Well, yes, it would be! So, here it is.
Here’s your miracle! It’s “Christ in You!”
“That’s it?” you now proclaim,
disturbed by the simplicity of the statement.
“Christ in me? I already know
that! What a rip-off this book is!”
Well, did you think it was
going to be complicated? I’ve already
told you that I can’t think that profoundly.
I used to, but, not anymore. God
has simplified my thinking so He could get me to understand his complicated
universe better.
That’s the miracle part. I misunderstood the phrase “Christ in you”
for many years. I thought it was
something “holy,” that is to say, out there somewhere in la-la-land. The simplicity was lost in complicated
calculations. I tried to figure it
out. I would add the commandments
together with the do’s and don’ts and come up with a religion. “Christ in you” became a term, not a
lifestyle, until I looked at it from a new perspective. I made a lot of mistakes until I made the
discovery. And the great part of the
discovery? It was the “knowing that it
was the making of mistakes” that brought about the new perspective.
Remember the earlier example
of how Jesus was as a baby? He cried; He
needed burped, babied, and changed. None
of those things made him any less God.
None of our baby needs makes us any less a child of God. God’s spirit longs for me and has longed for
me from before time (that is, before my time began). Okay, it hadn’t been activated, and my life
had been a continuing contradiction of the perfect life of God. But, that doesn’t make me any less a child of
God. And, it by no means disqualifies me
from His plan for my life.
Look at it this way: Your birth is the birth of the Christ child
all over again – you “literalist” relax a little, I didn’t say anyone “was”
Christ. I just mean that Christ created you as a vessel in which Christ’s
character would dwell – a place where the Holy Spirit could work.
How many times have you fallen
on your face? How many times as a baby
trying to walk did you stumble? How many
times have you fallen on your face since you grew up? Does your falling on your face disqualify you
from being a child of God? You think it
disqualifies you (how dare you fail so often) and maybe it does, but does it
disqualify God or what He still wants to do in your life? Of course not!
STOP LIMITING WHAT GOD CAN DO BY WHAT YOU HAVE ALREADY DONE!
Fall on your face a thousand
times and I’ll bet you that, because of the way you were made, eventually you
will walk and astound everyone – just like a baby’s first steps. That’s because you were made to walk - and
run. Well, God bless you, you were made
to, eventually, fulfill his plan – and, you will. You were made for this miracle!
Right now, all you have to do is rest in His assuring arms. Jesus had to trust his parents to raise him. Do you think they were perfect? No! You see, it’s not about your parents – or your surroundings. It’s about you - even if you don’t see it now.
Go ahead and be a baby – it’s your right.
Take a
nap. We’ll talk more, later.
end of chapter 4
A footnote:
“The whole of our life inside and out is to be absolutely haunted by the
presence of God.” Oswald Chambers
Yes, my friend, we can be so unlike
Christ? Using myself as an example, it
is not hard to find those ways. I make
big mistakes - He made none! I have to
be forgiven - He never did anything wrong, so He never needed forgiven. My actions are nearly unforgivable. When I need to get away I can’t just disappear
from a crowd as Jesus did; I usually have to face the consequences - and,
usually, alone. I can be downright
evil. My faith is smaller than a grain
of mustard seed. My heart is
wicked. The late Keith Green wrote, “My
eyes are dry, my faith is old, my heart is hard, my prayers are cold. But, I know what I ought to be; alive to You
and dead to me.”
The awareness of the presence
of “God in us” (not at all opposed to “us in God”) causes us to react in godly
ways. It causes us to think in godly ways. “In Him (and Him in us) we live and move and
have our being.” As a child, we will
automatically react to something that scares us, makes us happy, or excites us. We react to it because we have learned to
react to it – we have some experience with it, even if it is just the
anticipation of the unknown. As a
Christian, we learn how to react from the inner experience we have with Christ
in us.
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bless you.....................................Eugene H. Maze
This chapter and all chapters related to this website book entitled "Dark Days" (copyright 2004) was written and published by Eugene H. Maze. No portion of this book may be copied, sold or distributed either by electronic or other means in any fashion whatsoever without the expressed written permission of the author. Permission for distribution may be obtained by contacting the author at ehylandmaze@aol.com. Links to this and all previous and subsequent pages of this book entitled "Dark Days" may be distributed freely without permission.